Why don't more leaders listen more?
Dan Mulhern has some ideas.
Mulhern is an executive coach, inspirational speaker, writer and podcaster. Over lunch at Troppo
restaurant in Lansing, Mich., he also shows himself to be a listener who asks a lot of questions.
He understands the importance of active listening. In his book, "Everyday Leadership: Getting Results in Business, Politics, and Life," Mulhern wrote, "Leaders thus share their visions and values and then listen hard so that their teams can share theirs in return. When each buys into the others' vision and values, commitment rises all the way around."
Yet, we all know of organizations where listening seems not to take place.
He has a few theories about that, too.
Mulhern says listening is hard work. "It's because the mind is so noisy. It's processing ideas and impressions at a really fast rate."
He cites "Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking." In it, author Malcolm Gladwell writes that "Blink" is about the first seconds of an exchange -- when so many impressions are made. It is all about about how fast we form judgments -- in the blink of an eye.
Mulhern said, "When you say five words, I think I already know what you're saying and that throws me into my mental box of ideas." It takes discipline to stay out of that box, to not have our minds made up so quickly and to take the time to peel back the layers of what the person can tell us.
So, that is one obstacle to listening. Another can be ego. "We want to project ourselves," Mulhern said. "We want to prove something." Business can be competitive -- brutally so -- and people want to show what they bring to the table. They think that you do that by talking, not listening.
And, a third barrier, which is especially acute during the business and economic decline of 2008: listening can be expensive.
"When people are under great pressure to produce, listening can seem very expensive. There can be a tremendous feeling that they are wasting time. The apparent situation is that it's costly to listen."
No doubt, listening inefficiently or listening without hearing can be very costly. There is the waste of time, that increasingly valuable resource, but poor listening can lead to even greater losses for a company or organization.
"In
reality, listening can save money," Mulhern said. "If they run off in a direction that you're
ultimately not going to go in, or run off in eight different directions," then hearing them out and redirecting them can save a lot.
Mulhern pulls another volume from his mental bookshelf, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People," by Stephen R. Covey. Mulhern cites the Fifth Habit: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood." That approach -- the quest for understanding -- seldom wastes time, if people would just carve some out to do it.
Mulhern admires good listeners and has seen several in action. His top-of mind examples are in politics. "Lots
of powerful, charismatic leaders draw their power from listening -- or
appearing to listen -- intently. Don Reigle (a former Democratic Michigan senator) is one. Bill Clinton
another. When you are in the presence of these listeners, the world
gets real quiet."
"An extraordinary listener elevates the quality of a conversation so that you say things you didn't even know were in you."
That kind of listening, brought about by disciplined silence, keeping the ego in check and seeking true understanding, will seldom be a waste of the organization's resources -- people's time.
Mulhern's Web site includes some of his writing, links to his podcasts and news about a couple of Align for '09 leadership workshops he has coming up in Las Vegas and Detroit.